There was this bit of magic on Friday night. It happened when David was strumming a few chords on the guitar, clumsily, in the room that bore an Indochina reminiscent. Then I started singing along the line of that nostalgic vibe. “For all these years, you didn’t have a home…” The lyrics were complete in the next several minutes. He said it was touching for him to play, and he was just trying to find the right chords to go along.
The magic lasted for a while. I told some people about the new song, the first proper one that I wrote with someone. I thought about getting it registered, about going to the studio. The thought sustained me well enough that I gave some of my cash to a lady going through the trash at almost 2 am on the street.
And that was it. There was no sex. I didn’t mind, having it or not having it. But he was quite and reserved always. Physically, I wasn’t sure if the attraction was even in the room. The music was enough, the smoke was enough, the sound dropping on the hot summer night was enough, despite our taste being slightly different.
Last night, at a party, I lingered a bit, since there was this chocolate selling guy who was probably gay. The Embassy guy who I thought was gay was there. My boss told me he thought he had the same thought. There was this friendly guy from the hotel who caught my eyes rolling, then told me that he could read that I was gay, but he wasn’t. And there was Anthony whom I had had sex with three times or so, and another one who used to in a three way with me. But that wasn’t the reason I wanted to disappear.
And while I walking towards the parking area, trying to find some consolation for the night, there he was again, out of the blue, driving in the opposite direction. David caught my eyes and stopped right there. We went back to his place. He was tired, and he was coughing all the way, but he grabbed the guitar and played some really sad chords.
What you’re doing?
Come play video games
Cuz we’re just the same
I named the one last night “Hey”. I couldn’t think of anything better, even now. There was something platonic, about the title, it wasn’t romantic nor intimate. But also there was something that made you want to cry. There was something like a pleading, but to no one specifically. I liked that about David, since at least there was no worry.