I was cleaning my the office desk the other day and some paper sheets fell out of the file. It was the documents for the Japanese delegation that I was taking care of that time. In the blank of side of one page, there was a line, in my childlike handwriting, saying “your boyfriend” with an arrow pointing backwards. It was the sign I made when I decided out of the blue to hop on the bus to the airport and surprised Joey when he first returned.
There was the week after last week, when sex wasn’t that available. I couldn’t touch myself. There were one or two bjs here and there but they were never complete. I didn’t want them to be complete either. I couldn’t remember the last time that I went that long without ejaculation, must have been about 5 – 6 days before Carlos showed up.
He was in my doorstep, after I finished the Tuesday class, with a big and beautiful grin, just to say sorry. It was his last night in town and he wanted to apologize in person for failing to come deliver a promised “hot blowjob session” service. I invited him in, fetched him a drink, told him that it was OK and let him carry on the conversation while I was having my late meal.
He was expressive. A bit awkward in manner, reminding me of that of Dan Baked Beans. It was clumsy, lots of hand movement, head tilting as words were flowing, a bit dorky and loveable, not staged in order to create a false impression of charm like Ben. I listened to him thoroughly, saying that his smile and the manner were what made him attractive. He then kissed me on the lips and gave me head for a bit in the living room. I stopped him out of insecurity.
We walked around a bit, trying to find a motel somewhere close by. It wasn’t until when he walked with me that I realized how much taller he was. “We’re the same, I’m just a bit bigger,” he commented upon realizing the fact that we were given quite an amount of look on the street. We kissed in the dark. Being aware that he had “ice” in his pocket, I decided to take him home rather risking it at some strange place.
He quickly got undressed and quietly moved into the darkness with me. Our bare bodies were covered up in my Pokemon blanket and dancing to the same rhythm. I could tell that he had been yearning for this, as much as I had. All of the sexual craving had been built up to this point where it was elevated and pleased with his touch and professional head giving skill. And the most surprising thing hadn’t come yet.
He climbed on top of me, slid my cock inside his hole, where I felt warm and gladly welcomed. He didn’t even sit on my body or make my cock suffering the total weight of his strongly built Kiwi body but just balanced himself in the air using the strength from his two legs. Up & down he was moving, faster & faster each time, no creaking sound from the bed, loud breath withdrawn, his eyes locked against mine. Our eyes, our facial expression, that was the only thing we could make out in the dark. It’s the secret language we were speaking since no noise was allowed to escape that room.
The riding had to stop, despite my will, when I realized I had been fucking him bareback. The condom had been sucked inside his hole, far too deep that I couldn’t track its trace with my fingers. He wasted no time by moving down to my cock once again and sucking it until the load that had been gathered up inside me for days and days finally exploded.
Do I miss him? Yes. Was it him, Joey, the one I that miss? Not really, but more so the thought of being with him. It was over, the feeling about him specifically, quite more quickly than I thought it would be.
The words stopped flowing and the mind stopped leaking melodies to make room for more humming and singing, again. I’d been planning things for the trip with Damian. I stopped the smoking & started going out more, with Dan, with Matt, Alyona, the APEC girl. I asked her to bake with me. I cycled more. Last night, at the movie (we saw Arrival), Dan was holding my hand. It wasn’t a rush. It wasn’t a crush. It didn’t feel electric, which is exactly what had been expected since I didn’t see anything with him. But it was enough to mitigate the loneliness.